I just wanted to pop in and say hi! It’s been awhile since I posted something new and I have been horrible about leaving comments lately. I have been really depressed, blogging and creating has come to an abrupt halt. Whenever I sit down to come up with new ideas or write a blog post, I draw a blank. I concentrate and concentrate and there is nothing, it is very frustrating.
For the past several months my bipolar symptoms have been more noticeable, especially the depression. I have been trying to deal with it on my own, but it is getting harder and harder. I have been pushing myself, hoping I would snap out of this slump. I started exercising, have thrown myself into spring cleaning both my house and yard, and go non-stop from the time I wake in the morning until I go to bed. I have accomplished a lot, lost a little weight, the house is clean and the yard work ahead of schedule, however, inside I am a complete mess.
Certain aspects of my life are magnifying my symptoms and I am not sure how to correct the situation without making myself sicker. Each time something bad happens in that certain part of my life, my bipolar symptoms get worse. It is very important to me to make that area of my life better, but the way I have been handling it is not helping the situation or me. I don’t want my husband and children to have to see me completely break down and feeling miserable all the time is not how I want to live my life. I want to be healthy and happy, enjoy my husband and children, and be able to create. I want to stop feeling bad all the time.
I have decided I can’t do this alone, so I am going to start therapy. I loved going to therapy, I always found it so helpful. It can be a lot of work but the end results are very rewarding. Unfortunately, I have to find a new therapist. The woman I saw in the past was amazing but she does not accept my insurance and I can’t afford to pay for it on my own. I am hoping I can find someone I am compatible with. I want to acquire the tools to help me tackle the challenges I face in a positive way.
I hope everyone has a beautiful Sunday.