Sunday, April 18, 2010

It’s Been …


I just wanted to pop in and say hi! It’s been awhile since I posted something new and I have been horrible about leaving comments lately. I have been really depressed, blogging and creating has come to an abrupt halt. Whenever I sit down to come up with new ideas or write a blog post, I draw a blank. I concentrate and concentrate and there is nothing, it is very frustrating.

For the past several months my bipolar symptoms have been more noticeable, especially the depression. I have been trying to deal with it on my own, but it is getting harder and harder. I have been pushing myself, hoping I would snap out of this slump. I started exercising, have thrown myself into spring cleaning both my house and yard, and go non-stop from the time I wake in the morning until I go to bed. I have accomplished a lot, lost a little weight, the house is clean and the yard work ahead of schedule, however, inside I am a complete mess.


Certain aspects of my life are magnifying my symptoms and I am not sure how to correct the situation without making myself sicker. Each time something bad happens in that certain part of my life, my bipolar symptoms get worse. It is very important to me to make that area of my life better, but the way I have been handling it is not helping the situation or me. I don’t want my husband and children to have to see me completely break down and feeling miserable all the time is not how I want to live my life. I want to be healthy and happy, enjoy my husband and children, and be able to create. I want to stop feeling bad all the time.


I have decided I can’t do this alone, so I am going to start therapy. I loved going to therapy, I always found it so helpful. It can be a lot of work but the end results are very rewarding. Unfortunately, I have to find a new therapist. The woman I saw in the past was amazing but she does not accept my insurance and I can’t afford to pay for it on my own. I am hoping I can find someone I am compatible with. I want to acquire the tools to help me tackle the challenges I face in a positive way.


I hope everyone has a beautiful Sunday.

3 comments:

  1. It has been raining here for a week and I had a birthday this week.I have been feeling down myself.This is my therapy blogging I mean.Sure hope it stops raining.Hope you feel better soon.My sister is bipolar it's a tough one.Hope you find someone you can trust to help you with this.I will be rooting for ya.Feel free to stop by and chat if you'd like!Take care.The creativity will come back to you soon.Don't try so hard.Happens to all of us from time to time.You are in good company my friend.Best wishes!!

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  2. Heather, I'm sorry to hear that you've been feeling down, but I'm glad you're seeking help. Have faith that you'll find the right person to help you. Also, put your trust in God, and ask Him to help you through this.

    As for the creative block, you'll eventually break out it. I know it can be frustrating, but rest assured we all go through it.

    I'll put you on my prayer list, and I'll send you good thoughts.

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  3. Hi Heather, I'm sorry you don't feel well and I'm glad you're getting assistance. I've been working so much that I'm not interesting in anything creative but sleep...and more sleep.

    I wish you well and you're always welcome if you need to chat! :)

    Desiree (foxes and robbers)

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I love reading your comments. I like knowing that I am talking to someone other than myself for a change.